Saturday, January 28, 2012

Advice and Assholes: the sun shines on a dog's occasionally.

There are a lot of tips and tricks you'll hear when you have kids. Some are completely impractical for you and your situation, some just don't work, and some are more difficult to execute than they're worth. However, there are a few that I have found absolutely invaluable, and I shall share them with you in hopes of making your life easier.

1. Saline drops relieve stuffy noses. Just a couple drops in each nostril will loosen up the snot and help reduce swelling. My son actually smiles after he gets over the shock of having crap squirted up his nose.

2. Bag Balm and Vaseline fix and prevent diaper rash. We have not had a single occurrence since the bad rash I mentioned in a previous entry.

3. Routines are key. At 10 weeks old, my son now goes to bed with little fuss because it's just time. If we deviate from the routine, he gets super fussy until he's taken care of. Totally worth it for our evenings child-free. We do a bottle around 6:30, a bath around 7:30, and another 2 ounces of formula afterwards. He's usually baby-coma'ed half way though the second bottle, but the little extra bit is really helpful in getting him through the night. He sleeps from about 8:00 to 3:00 am, then from 3:30 to about 6:30. Again, 10 weeks old!

4. Warmer sleeping clothes. It is recommended that you keep a baby's bedroom cooler and have a fan on, but that doesn't mean the poor kid has to freeze. I have several thicker, warmer sleeper onesies that keep him nice and cozy without risking suffocation. He sleeps much better in the thicker outfits than in thinner ones.

5. Rose water cures hiccups. The books will tell you to try a bit of water when your kid has hiccups. Yeah, they really hate that. Adding a couple drops of rose water and some sugar makes a yummy treat out of it. My son still has issues swallowing the liquid if it's not in a bottle, but he's willing to actually try and doesn't scream afterwards. Plus, it makes him smell awesome! Seriously, even his poops are a bit more tolerable. My mother-in-law did it for all her kids, grand-kids, and other family babies and it works like a charm with no apparent ill effects.

6. Sign to your baby. This one is a bit weird, but I swear it works. There is a book about signing to your baby that has all kinds of different signs, from "alligator" to "saxophone", but it doesn't have to be that complicated. Currently we have one sign for food (your open and close your hand like you're milking a cow. It's technically the sign form milk, but it's an easy one for a baby to understand and even mimic back). My son will fuss and fuss when it is time to eat, but as soon as I ask him if he wants food and make the sign, he calms right down. The beauty is that he won't talk until he's two, but by six months he should be able to make the sign. Throw in "dirty" for the diaper, and "pain" and your kid can tell you what's wrong 18 months before he ever says his first word. I am quite excited about this idea.

That's all I have for now. I hope it helps!